Hang tough

This post started off in a completely different way, as I actually started it last Friday in a real temper. It was all about the fat lass 'Slip slidin', and began:

Right, this'll have to do in lieu of what I'd actually like to type, but that's way too rude and the censors would have a field day if I really let rip. So here goes - oh bottoms. Big, fat, wobbly, saddle-bag bottoms. And ageing, stretchy, gravity-dragged boobies. And pendulous, paunchy, poochy bellies to boot!

This isn't going to be a positive post. Heck, you could tell that, couldn't you.

I'm NOT a happy bunny at all, and the only person I have to blame for this is me. I don't quite think that the term 'struggle' encompasses what's been happening over the last couple of days - it's been more akin to 'galloping disaster zone' and I'm really peeved, angry and disgusted with myself.

Having made a little progress at the start of the week, and foolishly reported slight 'improvements', I proceeded to prove myself dead wrong. I chucked it all away and headed back to where I started (and wasn't happy about). I've had a few horrendous days and behaved like an utter brat.

So, taking a look at this whole sorry episode again, with the benefit of a good weekend and hindsight's.twenty-twenty vision...

In an attempt to keep my sorry ass out of trouble, I have started chanting a daily mantra to myself at the moment. I suppose it's a little bit like the Nike one... mine simply says 'you've just got to get on and do it'.

What I mean by this is that I am trying to persuade (OK, more like bully) my inner brat that I MUST stick to what I know works to keep my health and weight under good control... even when my mind is screaming 'c'mon, gimme a break, dammit!' and wants nothing more than to hibernate under the duvet or dive into a sea of carby 'treats' like a homemade fruit scone from the local tea shop.

I'll admit, this is easier to accomplish some days than others. I know that a lot of things seem hard for me at the moment and I'm aware it would be a simple out for me to 'take it easy' on myself. But I also know that this would be a mistake in the long run.

To that end, I did a session of my floor exercises this morning before I showered (not that I actually 'wanted' to at just after 5 a.m.). I packed up a sensible mid-morning snack of leftover cod loin (from last night's dinner), and a healthy, if pretty firey, lunch of red cabbage, celery and hard Turkish cheese salad, with a rather over-generous (and accidental!) dollop of pul biber. I'll walk at lunchtime and walk some more on my way home.

My darling lovely hubby doesn't know how much his love and support helped me at the tail-end of last week and the weekend. But it did and he's a shining example to me. I'm so lucky, and so grateful..

So this week will NOT mirror the last one. Even if I do end up slipping, or tripping or falling, I won't let it derail me or get me down. I will hang tough, and I will NOT let this lurking black dog get the better of me.

Onwards ever....