I won't go into it, but something has happened today to remind me that my darling Mum is never coming back, and I feel bereft, sad, heartsick, call it what you will.
I know it maybe sounds a little silly after the time that's passed, and because to all intents and purposes I'm 'fine' and I both can and do manage everyday life 'normally' for most of the time. But, and it's a big one - but every now and again something brings me up short and I remember all over again the pain of losing her as if it had happened yesterday.
Sorry chaps, but I've come to the conclusion that the age-old 'time heals' mantra is so much B.S. It may be that time passing means the frequency of such painful episodes lessens, but the actual feeling when it hits is no less intense.
So today I need a reminder...
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6 comments:
I agree with you- time doesn't heal all wounds. Just makes them easier to bear.... I had thought I was past the mourning process for the passing of my dad, after a year and a half, but last week a wave of grief hit me full force like it happened the day before. Came out of nowhere. You are not alone... My thoughts are with you, hoping for peace
I've found that it is always there, ever present, now bound to my memories. Sometimes grief is my silent companion, sometimes not when triggered by an anniversary, just glancing at family photos... or even a scent. Don't push the grief away, embrace it and cherish the good memories you have of your mother that unconditional love and that is what will help you through.
I don't have anything I can say to help you now, I haven't lost anyone so important and so close to me. But there is a poem I love that expresses what I would want to say - I don't know if you know it, but it's called Death is Nothing at All, by Henry Scott Holland and I hope if you read it, it might help a tiny bit - just Google the title and you'll find it
xxx
I don't have any words of wisdom to ease your pain. I just want to wish you well. Hugs.
I am so sorry. You're right, it never totally heals. My father died more than 20 years ago and sometimes it still takes my breath away when I realize he is never coming back. I hope you can find some peace with it, that is all we can hope for.
Thank you, my friends, for all of your very kind and supportive thoughts - they've really helped me get through a pretty rotten patch.
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